Some personal news: this fall a lot is going to change; I’ll be heading back out west (again) and back to school (for a third time) – this time to Stanford.  Their joint degree program is really good if you’re looking to get into IP law.  At $50k per year, it’s on the pricy side, but fortunately (for me) LR is paying.

Why would Laminar Research pay for this?  Well, if you haven’t read the news…

PRESS RELEASE

Laminar Research announces concession to Microsoft Flight Simulator, will withdraw from flight simulation market.
New business model in Intellectual property announced.

April 1, 2013
Columbia, SC:

THE CANCELLATION OF X-PLANE:

Austin Meyer, author of X-Plane, announced today that he will be withdrawing X-Plane, and ceding the flight simulation market to Microsoft Flight Simulator. “Sales of X-Plane are growing exponentially, but I wanted sales to grow exponentially times TWO!” claimed Meyer, citing poor sales as one of the reasons that he will be removing X-Plane from the market.

As well as canceling X-Plane for Macintosh, Windows, and Linux, Laminar Research will be removing X-Plane for iOS and Android from the App Stores. When asked why, Laminar Research President Austin Meyer was very clear. “Let’s be clear”, Meyer said “The AppStore generates significant revenue for Laminar Research, but only after I have UPLOADED the App for people to buy, and this is a frustrating process that can take in excess of 30 minutes… sometimes even 45 minutes if I am downloading episodes of “Breaking Bad” at the same time! I just cannot justify that type of grueling WORK!” Meyer noted that he believes that the Apple AppStore is an old idea with “limited potential” that only benefits a few people at the top of huge mega-corporations, since small, hard-working, creative developers could never get an Application ON the AppStore, thus leaving all of the profits to a few huge, faceless corporations.

THE NEW BUSINESS MODEL FOR LAMINAR RESEARCH:

Laminar Research is announcing exciting new prospects for the future, though! Beginning this April, when Laminar Research removes the X-Plane product from all servers and sales outlets, it will move into the “Intellectual Property Licensing” business. Laminar Research has filed or acquired a number of patents on “blade element theory”, and “using a computer to calculate forces on an airplane”, and will be suing all companies in the flight simulation market for a percentage of THEIR income, rather than actually making anything of it’s own. “Remember” quotes Meyer “Running a business that actually CREATES something is so much WORK! You have to create a product that someone would actually VOLUNTARILY WANT to BUY, and then find a way to PRODUCE, DISTRIBUTE, and SUPPORT it! This is far too much work. It is much easier to SAY that I invented the IDEA of SOMEONE ELSE building a flight simulator, and then SUING anyone that actually DOES! That way, THEY do all the work, and I get the money for it! This is really a much more enlightened business model, and will be very profitable for Laminar Research, since I can now sue MANY companies in the flight simulation space without having to go through the tiresome process of actually MAKING anything!”

When asked for the specifics of how Laminar Research could actually do this, Meyer elaborated his future plans: “The patent system is EXCELLENT!” claims Meyer “All I do is send a piece of paper to the United States Patent Office claiming that I am the first person to think of someone ELSE writing a flight simulator! Since nobody in the United States Patent Office knows what a flight simulator is (Why WOULD they!??! They don’t build flight simulators!!!!!!!!), they OBVIOUSLY approve my patents, and that allows me to sue anyone that has actually CREATED a flight simulator!” When asked how Meyer could do this, when flight simulators have been in use since 1909, Meyer claims: “I never HEARD of anyone writing a flight simulator before I did, so I just logically assume that I am the first person to think of the idea! So I must OWN the work anyone ELSE does in flight simulation. That’s how the patent system works!”

None of the other companies in the flight simulation industry could be reached for comment, but are advised to save up money for their lawyers: Patent-infringement cases run about $2,000,000 in defense fees.

I am very excited for the company’s new direction; I’ve been coming up with obvious programming ideas for years now; finally we’ll get to monetize them without having to debug code first.

About Ben Supnik

Ben is a software engineer who works on X-Plane; he spends most of his days drinking coffee and swearing at the computer -- sometimes at the same time.

25 comments on “Laminar Research is Sending Me Back to School!”

  1. 😀 😀

    Nice one 😉

    Sometimes I really feel should go back to school (typically after half a day spent to finally find out I just forgot to have a semicolon somewhere in the code) 🙂

  2. ROFL! … wait – I already patented that business plan – and I’m also eagerly awaiting the series finale of Breaking Bad. 🙂

    cheers
    peter

  3. Microsoft has announced that they’re next version of Flight! will use an innovative “elasticity engine” flight model to power all aircraft in the simulator. We said they were doing this to circumvent patent litigation and because they like the feel of “very tight underwear”.

  5. I just want to get this straight: will X-Plane 10 as we know it not be for sale anymore? Is this the end of X-Plane? Will X-Plane 10 updates still be made available as they are released, like 10.30 etc…? As an aspiring aeronautical engineer, this seems to be gut-churning bad news!

    Regards
    Winston

    1. It does suck a bit if you actually like, y’know, flying X-Plane.

      But, as an aeronautical engineer, you should appreciate the silver lining: you will now be in a position to _license_ the rights to X-Plane’s IP!

      (Mind you, you won’t actually be able to license our _code_…that’s the beauty of the patent system: we can charge you for the right to solve a problem, without actually giving you the solution to the problem in a remotely useful form. It’s about time Austin went from trying to beat them to trying to join them. 🙂

      1. I am very familiar with this system of licencing rights to use intellectual property and perfectly understand this new ball game’s benefits (to a fair extent, first hand experience). Could my aforementioned concerns please be addressed?

    2. Winston,
      Mr. Supnik is just pulling your leg (“Winding you up” in the UK?). Look at the date of the main post…April 1. (“April Fool’s Day” – just in case you are not familiar with Western culture.)
      Not sure where you are writing from, but we can’t always assume everyone knows about April Fool’s Day.
      It’s pretty funny in light of the recent trend in Intellectual Property patent issues these days, and I salute Mr. Supnik for taking it to the radical, stupid extreme that seems to be less and less far away these days…

      I think we will look back fondly on the days when people actually MADE things, instead of suing everyone around them…

      Pat

      2. Kinda realized it after calming down a little… Nice one… 🙂 This April Fools thing isn’t so big in my country, SA, only see videos and read about it… Never experienced it first hand…

        That brilliant piece of work posted on any other day would probably have these forums overloaded with terrified and completely disgusted X-People sharing their wonderful point of views. On the other hand, that would never have made any other ‘flight simulation’ developing company happier…

        Thanks for the great work in XP, extreme pleasure to pay for this software.

        Regards
        Winston

  6. I’m a bit concerned about this strategy.
    ¿What if somebody patents the very act of patent trolling?.
    ¿Would that cause a recursive loop in the judicial system?.

  7. Excellent news! Luck is often described as the intersection of preparation and opportunity. Since I have flown every version of MS FS since Sublogic’s original 2-d version on an Apple II, and nearly every version of X-Plane, as well as being an IFR certified pilot, I feel I am well prepared. Thank you for creating the opportunity! I hereby offer my services to the new LR as an IP “expert witness”. I knew that my investment of countless hours of PC flying (beta testing too), buying and building PCs from parts from 8088’s to the latest i7’s, graphics cards, joysticks, rudder pedals and of course, real airplanes, insurance, hangar, gas, training and fees would payoff someday. I’ll take my expert witness fees in cash or gold please!

  8. Oh my god you killed X-Plane! You bastards!

    On the plus side Austin will be able to buy a much bigger airplane.

  9. I just patented the act of sitting on your ass while flying a Flight sim from now on no one but me is allowed to sit down while flight simming

  10. This strategy will fail, because you can’t patent what you can’t document. . . in triplicate! And in language us patent officers can understand. About Grade 3 or thereabouts.

  11. Oh, my God. In my country (Spain) on April fool’s day is December 28.
    As a recent purchaser of X-Plane You managed to terrify. Congratulations

  12. A patent needs to be novel. All you have to do is show that the thing being patented was already in the public domain. Journal articles on blade theory that predate the patent can be used in court. Earlier versions of X-plane can be used as evidence, particularly if the help files explicitly refer to blade theory. If some component was novel but secret, like the source code, then that is a protected Trade Secret. Even if someone uncompiles your code, that is protected by copyright. Don’t be intimidated by conmen!

  13. BTW if that post was true, it would in fact be “the story of 21st century Apple” (that you so much love).
    Just saying…

  14. “On the plus side Austin will be able to buy a much bigger airplane”

    And we all know that this has been the only purpose for the existence for XP anyway 😉

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